April Fools: A Story of Underwear Pranks
by Keeper of Tomes
Summary: A sequel to "Ask Me No Questions". If you ever wondered what Cyclonis wears underneath all of HER armor, well, read this. **WARNING TO ALL BOYS: CONTAINS GIRL'S UNDERWEAR**
1. It All Began With Hair Dye

Well, hello again. I'm working on Letter by Letter and the Finn and Dark Ace cooperating thingy, but seeing as I'm at my friend's house, and I have infected her with Storm Hawks mindworms, she would not let me sleep until I worked on this with her. This is the sequel to Ask Me No Questions, so go read that and then check this out. Oh, and one final warning...

**This fic contains graphic language of the femenine nature. If you are not a girl or woman or any kind of female, the authors strongly reccommend you stay away.**

And now, without further ado, Alex and Crystal Lit Moon present: April Fools: A Story of Bras, Pranks, and all Things Crazy

* * *

Chapter 1: It Began With Hair Dye

He never thought she'd stoop to this level. Sure, she was a fourteen year old, but he always thought she'd be a bit more mature...seeing as she ruled an empire and what not. He sighed and stared into the mirror at his new hair-do.

Pink.

Seriously.

She had an extremely twisted sense of humor.

He moaned and turned the shower on, before undressing and stepping inside. He'd be in here for a while, trying his hardest to get that dreaded pink hair dye out of his scalp. And while he was in there, why not plot revenge?

It had been nearly a month since his little escapade involving Storm Hawks and underwear, (need we say more?). His mind was still a little scarred from the event, and when Cyclonis had found out, it had been absolutely perfect chaos in the palace. The jibes had been coming fast and loose. And today, more than ever, seeing as it was that dreaded date on his calendar: April the First. Oh yes, that's right.

Today was the day for pranks.

And as soon as he got this dreaded color out of his hair, he'd get back at Cyclonis so bad, she'd never touch him again.

That's right.

He, the Dark Ace, was going to show NO. MERCY.


	2. The Plan is Hatched!

Chapter 2: The Plan is Hatched!!

All was quiet on the Condor.

Ah, who are we kidding?

When's it ever quiet on the Condor?

Today was April the First. Today was the day certain members of the Storm Hawks had been waiting for for nearly a month. They gathered around the bridge, still just Aerrow, Finn, and Piper. Junko had swooned at the thought of lady's intimate apparel, and Stork was being Stork.

That's right, ladies and gentleman.

I said intimate apparel.

"Alright. Piper, what's the plan?" Aerrow turned towards his navigator with a grin.

"It's pretty much the same as last time. We'll wing it in general. Just address the letters to Cyclonis and BAM! Underwear time."

"One problem: Cyclonis probably isn't as into guys as the Dark Ace is into girls," Finn pointed out. "We'll need something else to bring her into the open."

"Alright: We pose as reporters from 'Overlord Weekly Magazine!" Aerrow exclaims.

Finn and Piper look at him strangely.

"Geez. Normally I'm the one who says that kinda thing," Finn mumbled.

"Hey, I was just joking..."

Piper leans back and closes her eyes for a few moments. All of a sudden, she sits up, bright eyed and excited. "I've got it! We recruit the Dark Ace to help us with our...plans."

"After what we just did to him and his underwear, I doubt-"

"Hush and listen. Knowing Cyclonis, I think she'd probably play a prank on him, right?"

"Well, I dunno...She seems a little too strict for that kinda thing."

"Trust me. I know her, she'd want to do it. He's just too enticing of a target." Piper grinned. "We should know."

"Alright, so maybe Cyclonis did play a prank. Then what?"

"Okay, so, if he wants to get back at her, now's his perfect chance. We'll write to him as ourselves and ask him. I mean, seriously, what have we got to lose?" Piper smiled and reached for her paper and pencil.

"She's right. The worst he can do is say 'no'," Aerrow pointed out.

Finn cackled maniacally and rubbed his hands together. "Excellent. Let's get going, then, shall we?"


	3. The Message Received

Chapter 3: The Message Received

Later that morning, Dark Ace heard a knock on the door.

He stood to answer it, towel wrapped firmly around his still pink head.

"Message Crystal for you," a Talon mumbled.

He took it, then retreated back into his room. He activated the crystal and set it down.

"Dear Mr. Dark Ace..."

Now why was that voice so familiar?

"This is Piper, of the Storm Hawks. Before you turn this message off..."

Great. His finger had been right above the deactivating button.

"...we have a deal to propose. Knowing Cyclonis, she's probably played a joke on you this fine April First."

"No duh," he mumbled, fingering his newly colored hair.

"Well, we're thinking there's a way to get back at her. Me and some of my squad mates were wondering what kind of..._giggle_...underwear Cyclonis possesses. If you could help us out, we'd be eternally grateful. Remember, though: this is a temporary truce. Reply with an answer, and maybe some souvenirs." Somewhere in the background, he heard the ever-familiar sound of Aerrow's laugh.

What was it with these kids and underwear?

Well...if it meant getting back at her...

But first things first. He had to order several bottles of black hair dye to cover up the mess that was his head.


	4. Of Steam Rollers and Size A's

Chapter 4: Of Steam Rollers and Size As

"It was a good idea, using a Message Crystal."

"I figured he might toss a letter if it was from us," Piper said with a laugh. "Here's his response." She held up a white sheet of paper dotted with a few lines of text and a Cyclonian emblem at the top.

"Any, uh, packages come with it?" Finn asked with a snarky grin.

"Nope. Just a letter. Ahem: 'Storm Hawks: Yes, Cyclonis did prank me in a most undignified manner. I won't make you privvy to the details, but let's just say you won't see me in public any time soon. Fine, I will help you. I happen to know that she's going on a visit to Terra Bluster tomorrow. I'll see what I can do. Yours truly, the Dark Ace.' Oh, this is good stuff, guys."

"I wonder what size she is..." Aerrow mused.

"How would you know about that kind of thing?!" Piper exclaimed.

"Well, er...um..."

"Never mind. I don't know...Her chest is a bit on the flat side..."

"A bit?" Finn raised a blond eyebrow incredulously. "A bit? That's the understatement of the century. She looks like a steam-roller drove over her at birth. Either that, or her armor's just way too tight."

"Finn!"

"What? I'm just saying..."

"I'll betcha she's still in the A's." Aerrow grinned.

"I'm still in the A's, and you don't hear me complaining," Piper blurted.

"YOU ARE?" Finn and Aerrow exclaimed in unison.

"Yeah..."

The two boys snickered uncontrollably. Piper placed her hands on her hips and moaned. "It was a really bad idea mentioning that, wasn't it?"

"Ha ha..._snicker_..."

"If you guys mention that fact to anyone else in Atmos, or Cyclonia, or Terra Deep, or Bogaton, or anywhere, I'll see to it personally that you both piss purple for a week. Or two, or even three, depending on who you told!"

They have both fallen onto the floor with laughter. She rolls her eyes and leaves them to their insanity, wondering for what seems like the hundredth time why they don't have another girl on their team.


	5. Raiding the Nest

**Chapter 5: Raiding the Nest**

He watched as Cyclonis' airship took off, then sneaked out of his room. After checking to make sure no Talons were in sight, for his black hair dye mixed with the pink had turned his head an unsightly purple, he raced up three flights of stairs and dashed to Cyclonis' bedroom. No guards.

This was too easy.

He picked the lock with a paper clip, then slid inside with a whisper.

It was so darn...neat.

Ugh.

He made a beeline for the closet. After a few unsuccessful guesses, he finds the underwear drawer. After finding a cloth bag to put his treasure in, he stuffs it full with her undergarments, not even pausing to look them over. He was focusing on getting in and getting out. As any good stealth operative should know, the most important thing about a secret mission was speed.

As he zipped back into his room--closing the door with a sigh of relief--he came to realize how..._strange_ his master's...undergarments were. Strange in the fact that they were rather on the small side...and that they were _multicolored_. That was so _girly_.

And hearts. Cyclonis and hearts did not go together. Perhaps she was under the false assumption that no one would ever clap eyes on them anyways.

Oh, how wrong she was.

How wonderfully wrong.


	6. We Are Rewarded

**Chapter 6: We Are Rewarded**

"Oh yeah! Pay dirt!"

"What?" Finn and Aerrow looked up from skimmer repair to see Piper running in with a small bundle wrapped in brown paper. It crinkled softly as she set it down on the work stand.

"The package has arrived!"

Stork pops his head in. "Hey, is that my new anti-mindworm helmet?"

Silence. Everyone looks at him with a questioning glare.

"Eh, never mind." The Merb pops back out faster than a banana down Radarr's throat.

"Okay. Moment of truth." Piper tears the paper aside. "Whoa...That's...tiny."

Aerrow and Finn start laughing all over again. "Ha ha ha...Whoo."

Piper takes out a pair of panties with lace on the edges. Printed on the backside were the words: "**Queen of the World**". Piper barked with laughter. This was too good to be true.

Her eyes fell upon a scrap of white. "Hey, guys. Dark Ace wrote us a letter."

She began to read: "'In accordance to my inspections, Master Cyclonis' undergarment drawer consists of:

-Precisely 17 pairs of lace panties, colors ranging from vermilion to hot pink.

-1 pair of panties with three words printed on backside; I assume you can read for yourself

-colorfully decorated bras, all size 30A

-colors range from purple and pink to'...wait for it...'plaid.'"

Piper looks up from the paper. "Wow. He's pretty detailed in his...inspections."

"True that." Finn glances at the bras. "He's right. She's got little pink hearts all over her cups!"

"Shut up! Wait, there's more: 'On a personal note, might I add that one, her brassieres are on the small side, and two, what kind of overlord wears lace for God's sake?' He's got a valid point."

"I wish I could see Cyclonis' face when she gets back from Bluster," Aerrow said with a chuckle.

"Now...what to do with our prizes?"


	7. Homecoming Presents, or Lack Thereof

**Chapter 7: Homecoming Presents, or Lack Thereof**

She walked into her room with a yawn. It had been a long flight. She immediately headed to the bathroom for a nice long shower.

The warm water ran over Cyclonis' body and soothed her. _I really need a vacation_, she thought to herself.

After toweling off, she padded over to her clothes cabinet and opened the underwear drawer.

You can imagine her surprise when it was surprisingly empty of...well, underwear.

Somewhere in the depths of Cyclonia, Dark Ace heard a roar of anger, emulating from Cyclonis' quarters. And he smiled a very satisfied smile.

Then he got back to the ever important task of getting...rid...of...his...purple...hair.


	8. An Idea Slings Our Way, Quite Literally

**Chapter 8: An Idea Slings Our Way. Literally.  
**  
The three Storm Hawks sat around the table in the helm, looking over their prizes.

"We need to come up with something really good to do with these," Aerrow said with a grin. "Something devastating."

"I know! We do what we did with Dark Ace's underwear: banners!" Finn grins. "It'd be awesome!"

"That's so old, Finn," Piper moaned. "We need something fresh."

"We could shred it and use it as confetti..."

"Something this awesome cannot be shredded up."

"Frames?"

"No. Just...no."

All of a sudden, Junko walks into the helm, chewing on a sandwich of unknown composition. "Hey, guys." He picks up one of the bras with a rough hand. "What are these?"

"Um...Nothing!" Piper speeds over and gently relieves Junko of the cloth in his hand.

"Why didn't you guys tell me you ordered new slingshots?" The Wallop scratched his head. "Are they supposed to have hearts on 'em?"

Piper, Aerrow, and Finn looked at each other, one unison idea spreading across their minds.

Oh...

Cyclonis had better watch out.

Trouble was coming her way...

In the form of underwear.


	9. And To Think I Caused It All

**Chapter 9: And To Think I Caused It All**

Dark Ace was doing two things the day after his little excursion:

One, listening to Cyclonis rant about the loss of her personal articles, and two, trying his best not to show his face anywhere. His hair had resumed usual shade, that wasn't the problem. He just couldn't help bursting into laughter whenever he saw his boss wandering around the stronghold, arms crossed tightly across her chest, snarling curses at anyone who glanced at her.

Hehehe...

And to think he was the one who caused it all.

He hadn't told anyone, yet, and didn't think he would either. He was waiting to see what the Storm Hawks would do with their newly acquired prizes.

Maybe they should run them up the Cyclonian flagpole.

He'd salute it.

While doubling over with cackles of glee, of course.


	10. Target Practice

**Chapter 10: Target Practice**

Stork had turned the Condor towards Cyclonia. Obviously, Piper had shut herself in her room to figure out the best way to use their new...weapons. Finn and Aerrow, however, were actually testing them out.

"I say we return the panties via bra." Finn grinned.

"Right. Wrap them around crystals or something," Aerrow said, nodding in agreement. They had set up an easel bearing a picture of Cyclonis, grinning smugly. Aerrow loaded his "weapon" with some wadded up underwear and a pebble, before pulling back and letting it fly.

"Wow, these things are pretty strong," he said, laughing. The flying object smacked right into Cyclonis' face.

"That's a bullseye." Finn smirked and fired his load, too. "And here's something you don't get with a normal slingshot..."

"Double-cups," Aerrow and Finn chorused.

"Too bad they aren't bigger," Finn mused. "We coulda loaded a Turkey Burp in 'em."


	11. Loading Up

**Chapter 12: Loading Up  
**

The skies above have turned red as the Condor inches towards Cyclonia. Piper's found a way to lure Cyclonis out, but it'll require a bit of tact, which is something few of the boys possess.

She decides on using Aerrow. He's got some reason in his mind, she suspects.

He gets to go into the building and start the alarms somehow.

He and Radarr take off. Piper hands out bras to Junko and Finn, saving the nicest one, (purple with pink hearts), for herself. After loading them full of Icers and a wad of crumpled panties, they land on a terra close to the palace and wait.

Sure enough, about an hour later, the alarms start ringing. Aerrow radios the team to let them know that everything's going smoothly, but he has to do something real quick inside the palace. Piper shrugs and says they'll start firing.

It's a go.


	12. Questions Answered, a Champion in Jail

**Chapter 13: Questions Answered and a Champion in Jail**

Cyclonis wanders around her room, pondering what idiot could possibly have taken her underwear.

Ravess? Unlikely.

Snipe? Maybe he thought they'd be nice to wear...but still unlikely.

Dark Ace? Dare she even think that thought?

He was far too stoic to do something as stupid as that.

Then again, she had dyed his head pink.

All of a sudden, the alarms started blaring. Dark Ace crashed into her room, worry scribbled across his face. "It's Aerrow, of the Storm Hawks."

"Blast it." She snaps her fingers. "I'm kind of low on supplies right now. In all respects."

All of a sudden, Ravesss barges in. "Master Cyclonis, pardon the interruption." The sharpshooter swivels to glare at Dark Ace. "Dark Ace, have you been touching my private garments, by any chance?"

"No..."

"Someone's emptied my...my...cabinet of...well, undergarments!"

Cyclonis has taken on a very strange expression, something of a cross between embarrassment and guilt. She dismisses the sharpshooter and charges out onto the balcony overlooking the skies below.

Sure enough, there's the Condor, landed on a smallish terra. She sees people. All of a sudden, a wad of cloth flies through the air and narrowly misses her head. Dark Ace grabs it and unwraps it. In his hand is one of her...

Panties.

Oh the embarrassment.

He starts cracking up when he sees the note wrapped inside the underwear. She snatches it from him after some small resistance.

"'Dear Master Cyclonis: We've decided to return your private garments by air mail. Signed, the Storm Hawks.' Oh, so that's who took it!"

The Dark Ace is still cracking up. She eyes him suspiciously.

"Dark Ace, what are you doing?"

"_Ha ha, snort snort..._Nothing."

"Did you have anything to do with this?" she hisses.

"Erm..."

She snarls. "I knew it! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! Talons, arrest him and toss him in the dungeons!"

He allows himself to be led away, still cackling with glee, especially when a lace panty wrapped around an Icer crystal narrowly misses his master's head. This is totally worth it.


	13. To Bust or Not to Bust

**Chapter 14: To Bust or Not to Bust  
**

Aerrow was on his way back to the Condor, when he noticed three Talons, two of them just grunts, and one of them, the Dark Ace.

At first, everything seemed normal, until he noticed two things: one, the Dark Ace was laughing so hard he looked as if his heart would give, and two, he had handcuffs around his wrists. Cyclonis must've found out who nicked her...stuff.

Aerrow and Radarr watched as their "ally in crime" was led down the stairs towards the dungeons. He debated whether or not he should save him.

The man had given them the Master's UNDERWEAR.

He decided to grab him.


	14. A Word on Underwear Weaponry

**Chapter 15: A Word on Underwear Weaponry  
**

Dark Ace didn't mind being led down here. It gave him a unique opportunity.

"Hey," he said to one of his captors. "You know Master Cyclonis has hearts on her underwear?"

"Really?" the Talon said, eyebrows shooting upwards. "And how would you know that, sir?"

"Oh...I've had a look-see."

"Really?" The other one snickered. "I wouldn't mind running one of those up a flagpole."

"My thoughs exactly. Oh, and lace panties with print on the backside!" Dark Ace added.

"What do they say?" the Talons asked, stuffing him into a cell.

He leaned against the bars casually. "Queen of the World."

"You're joking!"

"Not at all."

Suddenly, there's a spiral of blue, and the two Talon guards collapse in a heap. He looks up and sees a highly familiar looking red head, grinning at him from the stairs.

"What are you doing here?"

"Freeing you," Aerrow said, cutting the lock on his cell. "It's a payment of sorts. For helping us out."

"Oh, it was my pleasure." Dark Ace sneered for a moment. "The truce is over as soon as you return to the Condor, right?"

"Right."

"So I can kill you after this, right?"

"No prob." Aerrow grinned. "By the way..."

They both looked at each other and grinned. Dark Ace laughed.

"Slingshots," they chorused. Then they parted, each to their own way.


	15. Mission Accomplished

**Chapter 16: Mission Accomplished**

Later, back on the Condor, after every pantie and Icer Crystal on the ship had been rid of, Stork flew the Storm Hawks back to safe skies.

Aerrow, Piper, and Finn were huddled around the table once more, laughing their heads off.

"And...and then...my shot was like, 'BAM!' It exploded in a shower of panty and ice! Man, it was awesome!" Finn leaned back, wiping a tear from his eye.

Piper grinned, but her smile soon turned into a frown. "Man, what to do next?"

"I dunno."

The two guys and one girl stared at each other. Surely, whatever they did next would have to be just as hilarious and degrading, if not more.

This was officially the best April Fools joke they'd ever played.

But the mission wasn't entirely over yet. There was one more thing they needed to do...


	16. Surprise Surprise, and Room for a Sequel

**Chapter 17: Surprise, Surprise, and Room for a Sequel**

Master Cyclonis had, grudgingly, allowed Dark Ace to remain free.

Actually, "grudgingly" is a bit of an understatement.

More like "threw fifty temper tantrums and hit him with her crystal staff over the head" ingly.

Later, rubbing the sore spot on his cranium, Dark Ace returned to his room, still chuckling. A package was resting on his bed, the blue insignia of the Storm Hawks gracing the paper. He peeled the wrapping back to find a nice little souvenir.

A bra, with pink hearts against a purple background. A little note was attached.

_This is the baby that fired the first shot. Hope you enjoy. Maybe it'll give you something to dangle over her, should she ever threaten you again. Signed, the Storm Hawks._

Dark Ace grinned.

Life in the palace was about to get a whole lot better.


End file.
